How to Support a Loved One with Depression

Major depression is one of the most common mental health conditions in the United States, affecting millions of adults and adolescents every year. Yet data show many people suffering from depression don’t seek treatment, perhaps because they feel mired down by feelings of guilt, shame, or self-directed anger.

Having a loved one with depression can be difficult, especially if you don’t know how to help. But as a friend, family member, or partner, you can be a source of tremendous support, helping your loved one take vital steps that can help them manage their symptoms and lead a happier, healthier life. 

At Bridging the Gap Psychological Services, Tioana Maxwell, PsyD helps patients in Houston, Texas manage their symptoms with individualized treatment for depression, including therapy and medication when needed. If you have a loved one who’s suffering with depression, here’s how you can help.

1. Be a good listener

One of the best ways to support a loved one with depression or any other type of emotional need is simply to listen. Let them talk and stay engaged while they’re talking, providing non-judgmental feedback that shows understanding and compassion. Don’t interrupt them while they’re speaking, and don’t give unsolicited advice. Try the active listening approach described at this website. 

2. Validate their feelings

As a good listener, it’s important to let your loved one know that you respect their feelings and their emotions. Let them know you’re available to them to provide them with support and love no matter what. Avoid making comments that are dismissive or that trivialize what your loved one is expressing.

3. Don’t try to “solve” depression

When a loved one is hurting, it can be very tempting to offer advice or “solutions” for their needs. But depression can’t be “fixed” by positive thinking or counting blessings. It’s a medical condition that requires a medical solution. Offering solutions — no matter how well intended — can make your loved one feel they’re not being heard or understood. Don’t try to put yourself in their shoes; just be there to provide compassionate support.

4. Learn all you can

If you don’t have depression yourself, it’s impossible to understand exactly what your loved one is dealing with. But learning all you can about depression will help you play your supportive role more completely and effectively, helping you empathize with your loved one without being patronizing or frustrated.

5. Offer support

Depression can make your mind feel jumbled and muddled, interfering with tasks of day-to-day living. Let your loved one know you’re available to take on those tasks, like grocery shopping, tidying, or running errands. Help them set schedules to keep them on task and provide them with clearer focus about their day.

6. Respect their space

Offering help is important, but it’s equally important not to be too pushy. Depression can make you very tired, and sometimes, the idea of social interaction can be overwhelming. Ask your loved one how you can help, and be respectful of their wishes if they tell you they just need some space.

7. Stay connected

Giving someone space does have its limits; if your loved one appears to be entirely avoiding any type of social interaction, suggest some enjoyable activities or outings, like a walk in a park, a movie, or a meal at a favorite cafe. Even if they say no, regular contact in person, over the phone, or even via text messaging lets your loved one know you’re there and you care about their well-being.

8. Practice patience

Dealing with a loved one who’s depressed can certainly be a frustrating experience, but it’s no fun for your loved one, either. Be kind to yourself and to your loved one, and understand that successful treatment doesn’t happen overnight. It can take weeks or even months before your loved one truly makes meaningful progress.

Compassionate, personalized therapy for depression

Depression can have devastating effects, but fortunately, it can also be treated. In fact, recent advances mean there are more options than ever to help your loved one overcome the crippling effects of depression and enjoy a happier, healthier life.

To learn more about depression treatment, call 832-662-3929 or request an appointment online with Dr. Maxwell today.